serenade

Monday, November 21, 2011

MY NOT SO IDEAL GUY 

He is not my type!

He is neither annoying nor attractive. He is just a typical teenager. Blah..Blah.. Actually, for my 18 years of existence, I have never come across with this guy. I just heard people talk about him but I haven't seen him for real.

Just a product of my weak imagination! (Just kidding)

Now, he is approximately 5 steps away from me. I shall not take any move that would catch his attention, I might be busted.

SIMPLICITY is really in him and I don’t care if he has just that. He smiles, he laughs, and he gets mad. He even cusses sometimes, and funny as it may seem but I find it cute.

He does not act as if he is someone who he is not. He does not boast or puts himself down. But let me clear these, he isn’t a mediocre.


missing link


For now, everything I have stated are nothing but mere observations. I am not into taking a step of getting close with him for I believe, “I don’t need to be by his side to appreciate the real him”.

He likes people who throw good punch lines. Moreover, he is even a lazy head; he loves to sleep and dislikes hassle. He was born to become a gentleman. Though he is a little bit big, he uses it to protect others and to make them smile.

I’ll end my positive talk about him this time. In the first place, I am not acquainted well with who he really is.


So, what now?

So much for the long introduction, I want to tell you that I am a modern hopeless romantic gal who wishes to find her own prince charming.

A prince charming—every simple girl’s wish. Who doesn’t want one?

I am a self confessed martyr of love. Back when I was in high school, I was a peasant of that cliché. FINE! That was all in the past but now, I am a changed person However, I sometimes blame my past experiences why I hate to fall deeply for someone right now.

I admit I am afraid of getting hurt. I don’t want to mess with my life again just because of a person who does not give some sort of appreciation.

BLAG!

I AM not a great LIAR. Well hey, I may not fall for someone too much but I have a bunch of crushes. But still, in the end of the day I would just be forgetting about them.

*****

Too much for the drama, for now I’ll be sharing with you my notebook—with a checklist in it about some of the top qualities I like in men, or probably I am just fascinated with.

*COOL not hot—I like men who are not stiff. I want it when I am comfortable with his company; making me feel as if I am a different person.

Probable cause: Angelica is a very serious and studious student. She does not spend her time to enjoy. That is why a cool guy would complement her. Someone that would bring her to places, make her enjoy life and would introduce her to new things that she have not experienced in life. COOL right?

Trivia: Guys with the muscles and the like makes me feel bad. I really don’t like it. Personally, you don’t need to have that abs and built to impress girls, being fit is good enough.

*Silent—a guy with sense does not throw words abruptly to impress girls. He who for sometime studies his environment first before blabbering too much is one such appealing guy.

Probable Cause: Boys are irritating when they talk too much compared to girls. Hey, are they aware that when they talk that way they sound too gay? And sometimes it’s as if they are too confident about themselves. Too many words guys would make you sound boastful. A MAJOR TURN OFF!

*Lazy heads with accomplishments—one thing I don’t understand about me is liking this type of boys. Literally, lazy men with great accomplished things are really cool. Think about how did they able to do that? Do they have powers?

Probable cause: Angelica likes it when boys are somewhat dependent to her. She wants to take care and show concern. Boys who are lazy and passive are most of the time considered by many as useless, but for me I understand what they feel.

Boys don’t want a hassle that’s why they let others do their tasks. Some would look like passive in front of many but if you check him out you’ll discover he is done with his stuff.

Trivia: Lazy and crazy boys are fun to be with. It’s as if you need not to worry about
anything going in your life.

*Voice Quality—this is not about a singing contest or a speech feast. I mean, sweet, protective and gentle voice would make girls jump their hearts out. If he can sing, then that would be a BONUS.

Probable Cause: Angelica is one of the boys; she is into so much shouting and stuff. So, she sees to it that she finds the right man who could make her feel special by just talking to her.
         
Another would be, is her being romantic and all. A typical girl would love to be serenaded with the one she adores. (I mean she loves.)

Trivia: A guy who discreetly sings well just because he doesn’t want to be recognize is absolutely my type of guy. A guy who knows he is good yet he doesn’t flaunt it.



*Smarty Pants—I go gaga over boys who have that substantial brain. I get intimidated most of the time, however ironic as it is they really rock my world. Talking about brains, you don’t have to memorize the whole encyclopedia or almanac. One just need to establish a good conversation and probably knows anything under the sun.

Probable Cause: Angelica thinks she isn’t that smart. She is very attracted to boys that know more or less everything in the world, from the air we breathe up to the process of how a car generates, a life cycle of a frog or how an airplane works.

Trivia: Look, it isn’t easy to find a guy with sense, I mean with BRAINS. I don’t care if he is in the honor’s list or what. It is not about the awards, it’s about his accomplishments. Who knows, the person sitting beside you is not talking at all but when that person starts to speak you’ll be left speechless.

*Music Maniac—it doesn’t mean that he has to be addicted with the same songs or bands that I like. Guys who are engaged into music really rocks, especially if he knows how to play musical instruments.

Probable Cause: As always sharing the same likes and having special skills is one just big package from a girl who hopes for a happy ending like me. For me, a guy who knows how to play the guitar or drums is very attractive.

Trivia: Alternative music or Rock-alternative is what I like the most. Sometimes, I go with old and dramatic songs (if and when I’m feeling something weird). Think about this, isn’t cute when you have that guy with you playing that instrument while you are singing with him? Uhhh….

*Mr. Clean—a simple thing yet everyone fails to comply. Boys with long hair and untidy look really disappoint me. I don’t really care if you have the face like a star. I don’t need someone to idolize, just a simple presentable guy would do.

Probable Cause: My eyes soars everytime I see those long hair, and untidy clothing maybe because of my upbringing. Since highschool, my school I’m in doesn’t approve boys with untidy hair which I believe is very beneficial to me.

Trivia: Who says one needs to be handsome or cute to be recognized? Nah… You just have to bring yourself well, and present yourself as clean as possible. Smell fresh. Look great.


*Gentle Heart—every girl wishes to have a gentleman with them. Gentlemanliness would make girls feel that they are important to you, especially if you are true to your deeds. Don’t ever try to become what you are not. Don’t try to be gentle if you aren’t, you will just end up fake.

Probable Cause: Most of the time, I do things for guys. When doing things, I see to it that they would feel important and special. That is why on my part, I would also like to be treated nicely, to be given importance.

Trivia: I’m really into being treated special, it’s just I want to be treated with respect. For I believe, it is only respect that would bind two different beings.

*The killer smile—boys’ smile makes me jump of my chair, giggle a bit and tremble my heart as if there would no longer be tomorrow. When the one you like would smile pleasantly at you, would you mind at all? Of course, you would lose your sanity a bit and just hear the pounding of your heart.

Probable cause: It is every girls dream to see their crushes or special someone smiling at them. No worries even if he will not talk to you. Just a smile from your night-in-shining-armor would make up your day. (Just as expected!) Don’t get me wrong here, this may be silly a talk but for a simple unnoticeable girl like me, a smile from HIM is one big blessing.

Trivia: Boys with great smile and with nice teeth surely will captivate a girl’s heart. He may not have the best look but if he can carry himself with just a smile, then that would just do. (Promise!)

*The humorous side—jokes may be plainly jokes but some are half meant. Haha! For some instance boys throw jokes that would make you fall for them. But the point here is not that, it is about how they make you laugh.

Probable cause: Boredom is out my league. I hate it when everything is just plain. I must say, I am very funny, weird and all but when it comes to the person I truly like I would shut my mouth up. (If forever would be a choice, I would do.) That is why I want to be with a person who knows how to heat up the atmosphere. If he won’t be that funny, what are we supposed to do? Stare at each other the whole day? Nah…that would be boring.



Trivia: This is the best asset a man must have to make girls fall for them. Some girls would say, humorous guys complement their personality. Being humorous doesn’t mean doing crazy stuff; it’s just that you just know how to handle things, making it more interesting.

*Snobbish/ arrogant / Authoritative—okay, I want it when a boy makes wise decisions. I believe that men who can stand with what they believe proves what a true man is. Call me weird and all, but I like it when a guy snobs me as if I don’t exist. Though I look like a crazy girl in front of him, he doesn’t mind at all.

Probable cause: The true me is bubbly and wacky, nonsense, happy but real. This personality comes out only when I am with my true friends. I love it when I look dumb in front of my guy while he thinks that I’m the weirdest thing ever created. YAY! Guess what? The more he snobs me and smirks at me, I feel more challenged.

Trivia: Hate me and break my heart, I don’t mind as long as you’ll just let me drool over you (Yuck! Haha). The snob and the arrogant type would be the one who’ll make you cry out of too much happiness when that one smiles at you. You would be the luckiest person here on earth since that heartless and numb guy gives a part of his time just to gaze and smile at you.

*Computer over-literate slash photographer—If there would be such term, that’s a nice description of HIM. I talk as if I have met this guy. Yeah, I was born a stalker and I know everything about his craft. For those people who know me, he isn’t the guy you think I am referring to. He’s from faraway islands.

Probable cause: This trait is based from a certain guy. Well, I just knew him through my stalking ability (and I am not kidding). I am fascinated about him being a bookworm, a movie fanatic, an amateur photographer, a visual editor, and a computer addict. He may not know about this, but he is one of the people that encouraged me to blog.

Trivia: Really, this kind of guy rocks, for not all men knows this craft well. There are those who have this ability yet do not make any move to improve it.

*Cute guys—let’s not be hypocrites! Who would ever say that “I love an ugly guy!”? I mean, no one’s really ugly but just for discussion purposes let’s just say they do exist. Every girl has her own picture of his dream guy. Someone that we paint in our own minds. Perfect. Fictional?

Probable cause: I just like charming, cute and simple guys. I don’t dream too much for all I know I am not that good looking. For once and for all let’s face the reality that not all of us are born attractive. I prefer my guy to be the best of what he is.

Trivia: My own picture of my perfect guy is Moreno, average in height, has thick eyebrows, slim, has pouty lip, pointed nose, puppy eye and with slight mustache and has good taste when it comes to clothes. (actually I’ve seen this man for real).


These are just some of the qualities that my not so ideal guy may/should possess. It doesn’t matter in the end. For all we know, as we take the course of life, we won’t always take into consideration all of the things present in the checklist. Because at the end of the day, you would probably forget everything you have listed once you meet a guy who would make you happy and loved.

What’s your type?  Is it the same as mine?


Saturday, November 19, 2011

Story behind my URL

Emotional parasite"

My blogger's name is no other special. For me this is just a short but a good picture of my personality. I am a parasite of my own. The only way of my survival is to get hold of my emotions. Getting hold of other's emotion too would mean entering in their lives. I love to be with other's. I love it when people approach just to ask for an advice.

Their emotional dependency towards me is my food, the thing that keeps laughter and smile on my face. I am too is emotionally weak.
I admit!
 But amidst that reality, I am able to touch and somehow change lives.

Truth speaks, emotional parasites  are no good at all.
That's right, they gradually eats the whole you.
your mind, your heart, your confidence, your happiness.
I have been once a victim, however I don't have the suicidal tendencies nor one of those captivated by the rise of the emo fashion statements.
Tears fall from my eyes too, misery once succumb my being but that is only in silence for others perceive me as a happy gal who loves to crack jokes and play around yet they still do not know what is inside me.


Emotional parasite is my expression
my life.
 my work of art. 
A parasite may address a negative connotation to many but for me,
it showcases a life that continually strives to live.
A life that can only be sustained if there is the existence of others.

This is My Blog.
This is Me.
I'm Unique but Simple.
Priceless : )

I assure you, Emotional Parasite has more to offer...

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Precious Gems




Friends  

are like a set of stone collection.

At first, we are exposed to different kinds and types of them. we keep on collecting and collecting without examining them very well. 

But it came to a point where we have to choose what to keep and what to throw.We choose those that interest us,those that we find unique.

And i'm proud to say that I have found mine. 


They come from different places, come in different forms and journeys yet their worlds collided with mine.

Whirlwind Personality

Ironic as it is, you are reading my blog yet you don't know me that well. Aside of course for my name Angelica. Let me share you things about me. Those stuff that you may somehow know from the moment you've seen my image up to the unexpected things about me.

ENJOY!

1. I'm cute. ^____^
2. My first is love is dancing but then i stopped when i realized that I was too big to dance. (literally big)
3. I had my first crush when i was in kindergarten.
4. Angelica is afraid of heights( standing at the edge of the second floor would make me shiver), of rats( i would run as far as I could just to stay away from it, and i don't care if i'm in a public area,)
5. I am very emotional, "iyakin" simple things make me cry...things that nakakatouch or things that would really scare or make me sad.
6. For me, boys are the best friend you can ever have. They can and will keep your secret. They won't use your weakness to put you down and they would make you smile and laugh whatever it takes them.(even risking their Lives??nah? i doubt.. maybe just their reputation)
7. I don't love sweets..(even with chocolates, I love the bitter ones).
8. I don't now how to get mad.. really!  i'm just that good..haha
9. My favorite no. is 7
10. I hated my grade five year. ( i was just very disappointed with my teacher.. well..past)
11. I love doing charity works like Gawad Kalinga..( i love helping, i just don't have the money that's why I want to coordinate with groups that would  help me to do this passion. I'm not rich right!?)
12. I enjoy badminton and when i start holding the racket, you'll see me very serious.
13. I easily catch colds.. bad!
14. Most of the time, I can't continue what I have started. All I have is the fighting spirit..
15. Reading stories fascinates me. So is writing.

One more thing, I am a PROCRASTINATOR, but I am fighting it really hard. `_~

No to Comparison

 
 
 
 
 Don’t ever compare yourself to anyone.

There is no need to, for you’ll just end up disappointed

about yourself or for someone else.

Think of the person that you were

years ago, there you will realize the best things that happened to you.

A change that is worth smile.

My 25 minute thought (10:10-10:35)

Hatred!!!
how I wish you can leave me,
I can no longer dwell with your baggage
It’s too much
I can no longer handle
You stay away
and leave sanity in me
Don’t crash my life
I do not approve
I need calmness not you
Poor soul who lives in misery
I no longer dare to be
When darkness succumbs my life
I see the storm in me
A fragile heart who wants light
who only wants to be poured down with majesty
I do not need extravagance
nor I do approve mediocrity
Can I ever be able to change the course of my reality
or be embraced by the curse that will shatter my positivity

Rescue me,

give me air

I need to breathe

For I shall perish if not

so please,

I need your empathy
not just your sympathy
for its only I who can rightfully understand me.


*I've made this for about 25 minutes while having our CSA1 class. I having nothing to do that time after I got to know those binary figures that  made me quit insane. haha..
video
The world today is in full chaos. People quarrel and fight or even end lives just to cut that anxiety in them, not knowing that many are suffering the consequences of their act. LIVE and LOVE, and always continue to SMILE. Make a chain reaction of change starting from YOU. Spread love and Good Vibes.

Synthesis of the Mind

Agony is not in the mind it is of the heart!
Life isn’t as perfect as it is but its imperfection makes it perfect.

Nonetheless, everything is simple
at first glimpse all is raw

and then man itself made everything complicated.
the mind perceives too much

that sometimes it stops to function
it can no longer tolerate the mishaps of life

toot..toot..toot..
Brain dead!
an alarming matter
aren't you afraid when the time comes
that your own brain won’t work anymore.
you do things that kills its life
it controls everything
yet your deeds tries to get hold of its power

when its end comes blame it to yourself!

Unrecovered ME

Where are you? I”m asking myself. I have been the best of me for so long but now deterioration attacked my personality. Whose fault is this, is it mine?

No doubt, the strong part of me has collapsed for a while. How can I ever look up again to see the sky with no tears in my eyes. I fear no one but myself. I am afraid to lose track of my standing. I wasn’t mesmerized by fame, nor by pride and by glory.

Stop the pressures! I do not need them. I need myself. The true me. The whole me.

I want to see that child again who sees only the positive side of life. The one who always sees the good in everything she encounters. Where are you now? I need you, I can no longer grasp the solutions of all the troubles that controls my life now. I need peace, I want it.

Truth says, I am starting to give up but my heart is pretty optimistic that somehow, in this course of time, I’ll be able to stand tall with no strings that propels my being.

Call me frank. Call me sensitive. I would never deny me. Yes, I am transparent, as transparent as the water that runs along the brook. I am not naive.

I dare to discover the depths of me for I know  I would never be in pain. I know myself, but for know is that so?

Change seems to eat me, I do not want this but can never stop this gradual destruction perhaps of the authentic me. No wonder, I see pain. All negativeness spoils me.

How can I recover? Now, tell me. :)

We are NOT Perfect!

Everyday of our lives, we keep on complaining why do things happen. We always try to blame others without checking if we have done something to make things right. It is just natural for humans to deny the fact that we have committed such flaws in life, but is it ethical to claim our innocence in expense of others’?

I, admit that the hardest thing for me is to tell the world that I have done something wrong. I’m not a perfectionist but I look at things on positive ways. It’s not a big deal if I have failed, but the fact that the people stare at you as if you are a criminal is hard to bare. Is it wrong to fail? Am I going to suffer forever because of just one wrong move?

This is the problem that is vividly present in the society. We always see the bad side(or perhaps just observing the bad side) a person has.We keep on counting how many times they have done wrong things without giving credit to the myriad of good things they have contributed not only in our part but also to the rest of mankind.

Isn’t it enough to see them sorry for what they have done? Precisely, I am not washing my hands about this fact. I am also judgmental but often than not, I try to examine what is behind every action a person does. For we don’t have the right to stereotype people nor to give judgements without enough basis.

Let’s open our eyes, we will see how beautiful the world is if we won’t dwell too much with it’s imperfection!

What I have done for this Planet?

Earth is the only planet created to nurture and cultivate life. It is a great privilege for us to be part and experience the myriad of things life has offered. On the contrary, it is our duty to protect, preserve and nourish the world we are in. The past generations proved their worth to be called “humans”, but the generation of today which I am part of, is simply a big disappointment. Yes, I haven’t done any good for this earth! I am admitting, I am one of the trashes of the society.

It was during childhood when I learned the do’s and don’ts, pros and cons of life. My parents taught me not to throw candy wrappers anywhere, to plant more trees and to love the environment. They painted this wonderful portrait of perfection on my mind and have tried their best to maintain those. But not until the time I was exposed to the outside world, the world once I thought was kind and just. I was captivated by the pleasure around me not minding the morals my parents had inculcated in me. I was not aware that I am gradually killing not only myself but the lives of the future generation, the lives that are expecting an impeccable home to cradle them. I am now becoming a sinful being against the world, against my parents and against the hopeful posterity.

For years that monster in me triumphed in transforming me into a person I don’t even know and imagined to be. I was eaten by the powerful lure of revelry it had brought me. It came to the point of rejecting my parents advices. Then, series of dilemma bombarded our planet. Flash floods, landslides, tsunami, forest fires and the like started to create fear in my system. Fear of loosing my pleasures, my life, my family and my world. I become frantic of what was happening.

In my mind, letters become words and deliberately become realizations. Then I started talking: “I have been one of the trashes scattered along the streets, floating on sewers, and suffocating the fresh air you are breathing. I have been an evil emissary who are to ruin the majestic creations offered to mankind. I continued to contaminate every inch of your actions, to do bad over what is good. I created an epidemic that led to the downfall of this planet. I am “not human”. I do things inhumanely for my own sake and happiness. If it wasn’t for me, this Earth won’t turn out as what it is right now.”

These are my realizations after discerning the consequences of my actions. I tell you,

I am not a paragon of morals and ethics, nor an advocate of wildlife and environmental preservation but I have seen the things I should have done right from the start. I should have been careful with my actions for it does not only affect me alone but the rest of the world. However, all of these are just late

cognizance of my deeds, all regrets and frustrations. And so I’m starting to build a new and brighter beginning for me today, not tomorrow or in the future. For I am living the reality of today where there is a need of abrupt cure for the destruction of the earth.

In the end, I haven’t answered the question what have I done for this planet. I may not have done anything yet for this planet. But I’m starting right at this moment with myself and with others by reaching out to them and by penetrating in their consciousness. Letting them know that we all have the capacity to create change. Everything just entails sacrifice—to serve and share what you have. And right from the moment you have read this, I can say I have done something for the Earth.

Having the will to follow the path I am starting to travel, then you can be my descendant—for change and betterment. Let us submit ourselves to become channels of the Earth’s salvation. Stand up and inform, instruct, inspire, insist and involve in the cause I am starting. Be one and be a hero of your own.
I have the ever friendly smile one could offer.
I give life to inanimate objects by telling their own stories.
The endearing optimist that comes from inside.

Angelica 
is my name. I'm simple, optimistic and emotional.

I get along with friends well because I'm bubbly and out going.  For others, I'm serious and diligent and that's also true. 


The gullible and bubbly girl that would make you smile.
Kids make me laugh. Taking care of them is one big satisfaction.

Fragile and silent rooms of my personality.
A sweet and admiring daughter.



A holiday person, takes note of holidays and plans for surprises.






Many may probably say I'm boring but let me just stress this out "I don't bother to do stupid things just to be accepted by anyone."


CALL me Frank, CALL me Stupid but that's me, no pretensions. I do things for a reason because I know I'll  be the one facing it's consequences.

I love helping others without asking anything in return from them. This is not boasting this is true.

Most of the time people laugh at me.
Most of the time I make them smile.
Then, I realized:

Do I look like a clown or am I just funny?


But in the end, the respectful me still pops out!!!
I may be living with the motto "I don't care"
but I still do have respect preserved in me.


A respectful spirit in me.








Angelica's a music lover..

i love alternative rock..
emotional songs are nice too.
plus Japanese songs equals My MUSIC World :)